"I am crazy," the Elton John in this photo whispers. Look at this photo long enough, and Elton John slowly starts to emit a high, gargling, eerie scream, a sort of "ahhhhhhhhhhh" sound, the sound a family makes when they pose for a photo and the flash takes too long to go off. "It's very young, isn't it? Vibrant." But Elton John doesn't care. "Will the young people like it?" someone asks. Elton John looked at this photo and said: "Yeah, cool, that's very me." Where is Elton John's viral article proclaiming him brave? Dude just jumped in front of decorative vomit and did a failed-magician-doing-one-last-show-on-the-end-of-a-dying-pier pose about it, and then made that his album cover. Supermodels get props for going un-airbrushed all the time. There is absolutely no way this photo has been in any way airbrushed. The fit of the suit jacket, the pockets still sewn shut. I am not 100 percent sure that Elton John's top button is securely attached to his shirt. The flash reflection on those $10 shades. A lot of that is to do with the stars-aligning-and-the-universe-flexing-into-one-diamond-moment combination of elements at play. Which makes it all the more incredible that this photo managed to be the most perfect photograph ever taken.
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